I got the idea for Twin Cities Toilet Paper Reviews in 2019 after I had was fortunate enough to use the bathroom at Barrel Theory. They stocked their bathrooms with the be-all-end-all of toilet papers: Charmin Ultra Soft. “They deserve an award for this,” I though tto myself. Unfortunately, I did not document this event as I was still normal at the time and hadn’t yet started taking pictures of toilet paper. It was about six months later when I encountered a toilet paper so awful (but likely not as awful as the stuff you’ll find at the Sate Fair) that I realized something must be done about this.
In the years since that fateful visit, I have used hundreds of bathrooms around the world—but I have never again been so blessed as to find Charmin Ultra Soft in another public bathroom. And for some reason, I never returned to Barrel Theory to officially review their TP.
But everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked…or when I hard-launched on Reddit. At least three other people shared the tales of their visits to Barrel Theory’s bathroom, all agreeing that it was the best TP experience, period.
So I finally returned to Barrel Theory in the summer of 2025, but all I found in the bathroom was disappointment. The TP dispensers no longer radiate the warmth of Charmin Ultra Soft. The bathrooms are no longer the beacon of strength that they once were.
These days, their stalls offer only a slightly-less-premium TP. I agonized over their rating for days. Did they deserve a lower one simply because they used to be better? Should they be punished for the state of the economy? Is the TP they use now not comparable to the TP of the past? In the end, I followed the one rule of Toilet Paper Reviews: if it’s not Charmin Ultra Soft, it’s not an A.
So while I cannot give them the highest rating, I am incredibly pleased to bestow upon Barrel Theory the first-ever top-tier TP rating.
